LEARNING THE ART OF PATIENCE
Patience, is said to be a virtue. It is certainly something I have had to learn the hard way since using a wheelchair. Through necessity I have had to slow down and accept doing things differently and more slowly. Just breathe!
Since the new millennium lives have changed more rapidly than ever before. You live a faster life, you have more information available, you expect higher standards from others, you experience more pressure to perform and you are influenced by social media more and more. With the onset of technology and the information age you have lost the art of patience and taking time for things to develop.
You don’t know what it is to wait for HSC results, you get them before Christmas now.
You don’t have to go far to get answers to any question - just Google it!
You don’t have to wait to be served in a queue - you pay for things online now.
You don’t have to plan going for a grocery shop because the shops are open 24/7 online.
You don’t have to wait for the snail mail, you just download documents now.
You don’t have to talk to a person to get to know them, you look up their profile online and click for the information before you even have to make the first contact.
As a result, you have an increased thirst for knowing what is happening next, you no longer have faith in the unknown. You must know now! You travel to unknown destinations with a GPS, no need to research a map anymore, the GPS voice tells us where to go. This expectation of having what you want instantly has bred an element of needing control that in my opinion can actually limit your potential. You have no patience to wait any longer, to show empathy, to slow down and let things unfold naturally.
You are all inundated with statistics, emails, trends and the latest up to the minute information on just about anything you can think of. Life is more and more instant. There is no such thing as delayed gratification. You know much more now than ever before. As a by-product of this information age, the levels of anxiety and insecurity about the unknown and about yourself has widened.
My spinal cord injury certainly forced me to slow down and develop patience. Patience in all types of situations:
Patience for myself and my inability to do things now at the pace that I wanted to, just getting dressed took me an hour when I did it the first time.
Patience for others and their lack of understanding or knowledge about disability. When people asked my sister how I was, even though I was sitting right next to her. Fortunately that was in the early days and it no longer happens as much.
Patience to keep believing in the unknown and having faith it will work itself out. That a man would come into my life one day and love me just as I am.
Patience for the hard times, when I was challenged to my extreme and questioned my existence. Was it worth to keep living?
Patience for the self-doubt and moments of darkness that I knew one day would pass. Hanging on to the small wins to keep going and keep believing in myself.
Patience for the good times when they finally arrive, being grateful for what I have.
Patience has been needed all along. Letting go of control is at the core of learning what patience is all about.
The more you try to control your existence the slower your goals are achieved. Just like the driver who tries to overtake other cars, sometimes even dangerously in an effort to get to their destination faster, only to be faced with a red light and having to stop, not getting ahead at all. I’m all for the tortoise making it to the finish line!
The truth is, the tighter you hold on, the less you evolve along your path of purpose and the less you are happy with your lives. It takes letting go and trusting the unknown to start hearing your inner voice and gaining control of your life. By allowing events to flow where they are destined to go, you create the life you are meant to have. Feeling Safe by Letting Go delves into this concept a bit more. It takes patience to slow down and see the signs, get confident in yourself and create a life you are happy to live.
What area of your life needs more patience? Can you let it go and let it flow? Can you trust the process and believe in the unknown? Take the leap of faith and have confidence in your abilities, with patience you will produce the outcome you need.
